So I have been thinking a lot about my life lately. I have been thinking about my trials and blessings. Sometimes (much of the time) I feel like the Lord may pick on me a little. I feel like my trials are so much harder than others.
I often think why did my mom die? Why did my dad get remarried? Why are boys mean to me? Why can't I be attractive? Why can't I just feel really good about myself for one day? Why do my hubcaps always fall off when life can't get any lower?
They often say that your trials always end up being a secret blessing in your life. Well there have been many trials that have really turned out to be blessings in disguise. Like my job position change. I loved my old job, but now I have a new position within the company. It wasn't my first pick, but I really have grown so much from it. It has sincerely been a blessing. However the other ones listed above. I don't know how they ever could be turned into a blessing.
So even if I am a bit picked on, how do I keep a smile plastered on my face, and continue to enjoy my life despite of these circumstances. I know that my happiness isn't based on having a mom, measuring my self worth by what boys think of me, or even being skinny and attractive. I think the source of true happiness comes from living my gospel standards and doing what I know the Lord approves of. For it is only through my faith that I can truly be happy and discover the person that the Lord wants me to be. It is so hard and sometimes I feel very overwhelmed at what He expects of me, but I have faith that with his help I can.
After all, if He believes I can, than I have every right to believe that I can too.